52 Ancestors Challenge Week 48: "Overlooked" - Uncle Allen's Thrift Store Find

Just recently, the craziest thing happened. Something that could have been overlooked or ignored wasn't. 

My Uncle Allen loves to go to thrift stores. Loves it! He has several that he frequents. Just this past summer he went to one he hadn't visited before. There he saw a thin book that stood out to him because of the title; Southside Burial Ground, Ozone Park, NY, published in 1996. Allen's maternal grandparents, my great-grandparents, Charles Henry (March 26, 1896 - June 14, 1949) and Anna Sauer-Henry-Stoothoff (July 19, 1899 - May 8, 1986), grew up in Ozone Park, Queens County, New York and only moved to Nassau County, New York after they were married.

Charles died young; he was just 53 when he passed away in 1949 from peritoneal cancer, a rare form of cancer of the stomach lining. His widow, Anna, eventually remarried on October 7, 1963 to Frank W. Stoothoff (February 21, 1903 - September 17, 1993), her first husband's cousin. Oh yes, that's right; as if my tree wasn't messy enough. My step-great-grandfather was also my first cousin 3 times removed. Charles Henry's mother Annette Hinch-Henry (February 22, 1868 - March 2, 1952) was the younger sister of Frank Stoothoff's mother, Sarah Bridget Hinch-Stoothoff-Rhodes (July 25, 1873 - January 4, 1965).

When Uncle Allen came upon that book in the thrift store he immediately thought that I would love the book because it was about Ozone Park but he put it down. "Ah, I'm not gonna get it." He then continued to walk around the shop for a long time but before leaving he was drawn back to the book and decided to flip through it and stumbled upon the name Stoothoff in the text. He thought, "Well hot damn, I'm gonna get it for her." I don't know if he said hot damn but I imagine he did. He would say something like that.

When he gave it to me, we sat and talked about the Stoothoffs for a bit. My grandma wasn't particularly fond of her step-father but I am not entirely sure why. About 10 years ago or so, when my grandmother's memory was still a bit intact, we visited with some of her Stoothoff cousins, June and Dorothea McCowen. Their mother was Frank Stoothoff's sister, Ann Elizabeth Stoothoff-McCowen (June 20, 1895 - July 30, 1988). Their mother was actually named after my great-great grandmother, her aunt, Annette "Ann" Hinch-Henry, mentioned above. Anyway...

As soon as I got to June and Dorothea's house, one of them, I'm not sure who, told me that I looked like a Hinch. I look like my grandmother so, if grandma looks like a Hinch, then I do too. During that visit the sisters bestowed a photograph to me of my great-great grandma, Annette.  

She looks like Julia Roberts, doesn't she? But if Hinches look like Julia Roberts, I sure don't look like one of them. In any case...

June and Dorothea were very skilled genealogists and proud members of the Woodhaven Cultural & Historical Society. Sadly, Dorothea has passed since our meeting. 

When I sat down to read the book, this is what appeared on the verso (The verso is the back of the title page):

Get the hell out of here! I had to tell my Uncle Allen. When he bought it, again, he almost didn't buy it, he had no idea the authors were related to us. 

He and I talked for a bit about freaky things that happen like this and we both entirely believe it is an indication that the souls of those departed are still with us and trying to tell us something. I'm not sure what, but they are afoot, I am sure of it. Something made Allen go back for this book and I am so glad he did.

Thanks, Uncle Al!

52 Ancestors Challenge Week 47: "Wrong Side of the Law" - Albert Gardner's Brush with the Law Solidifies Name Changing

Oh this was tricky topic for me to address. Oh so many to choose from. What's a girl to do? I've got quite a few in my family who have had a brush with the law.

When I started my genealogy research over 30 years ago, I began on my father's side of the family trying to unpuzzle for myself some of the modern day connections I did not quite understand. I stayed on that side of the family for a very long time. I did not truly dig into my mother's lineage until after my grandpa passed away in 2004; about 18 years ago. 

That was in part due to the fact my maternal grandmother passed away before I was born so I had almost no source of information for her branch of my tree and my maternal grandfather was very reluctant to speak about his family history. He would answer my questions but I had to be very specific about those questions. 

I recall one time I asked him if he had any uncles to which he replied, "Oh yeah, sure." 

Silence. 

"Um, do you remember their names?" 

"Yeah" 

Silence.

"What were their names?"

"Well, let's see. I had an Uncle Babe and an Uncle Blue-Eyes..."

"Grandpa, do you know the names your grandparents gave to your uncles?"

"Hmm. I'm not sure."

Another big obstacle in researching my maternal grandfather's branch of my tree has been the fact that there was a surname change. My Great-great-grandfather, Damas Desjardins, French-Canadian by birth, Anglicized his name to Thomas Gardner. I suspect this was in order to obtain more work and avoid ethnic discrimination. I cannot find anything official about the name change and back then, before Social Security, it was easier to assume an identity. Assuming an identity isn't always about evading the authorities.

In some records Damas appears as Damas Desjardins, in others as Thomas Gardner, in others as Damas Gardner, and still others as Thomas Desjardins. To make matters even more confusing, his offspring indiscriminately used either last name as well. His son, my great grandfather, Almond Desjardins, like his father also chose to use a more American sounding first name; Albert. Almond, a.k.a. Albert, was indeed born in the United States; his name just sounded very French.

This flip-flopping of names not only makes constructing searches more challenging,  it makes proving anything a daunting task. I often hear myself saying, "Well, yes, I know it says that but it is the same man." Anything I can find that helps me to solidify this family's surname change is precious to me.

This branch of the family has also had some run ins with the law in nearly every generation. Which brings me to an article from the Brooklyn Daily Star titled "Sing Sing for John Miller: L.I. City Man who Swindled Magnus Larsen Sent Up on Suspended Sentence - Five Others Given a Chance to Reform" from December 21, 1907. In it is mentioned Almond Gardner. The first time I have seen my great grandfather listed with his very French-sounding birth name and Anglicized surname. In addition to showing his name in that way, it also documents when the family moved from Queens to Patchogue, Suffolk County, NY. What a gem of a find!!

It reads as follows:

"Almond Gardner, a former Astoria boy whose folks now live at Patchogue, took a quantity of lead pipe and brass sewer traps from a house belonging to George B. Ruthman on Main street last November. He is only seventeen years old and has promised to behave."

Interestingly enough, 24 years later, Almond's baby brother, Damas Jr., who might have been Uncle Babe, is also arrested for burglarizing a house while in his teens. That time, though, the house was out in Patchoque and Damas Jr. stole an electric pump with his soon-to-be brother-in-law, Elbert King. I found that in a March 31, 1931 article in the Patchogue Advance titled "Young Men Arrested for Stealing Pump." Tsk, tsk, tsk. What is with these boys?

Had Almond not committed his juvenile crime, though, I might never have had such concrete proof that he was known by variations of the names Almond Desjardins and Albert Gardner. Additionally, I knew the family had moved to Patchoque between the 1900 and 1910 censuses. This article, though, helps me to narrow the date of the family's move to after November 1906, when the crime was committed, and before December 1907, when the article was written.

Run-ins with the law result in documentation of the on-goings of a family. It's not all bad.
 

52 Ancestors Challenge Week 46: "Tombstones" - Perpetual Care

It is a fairly frequent experience for me to venture out to a cemetery where some relative is interred to find there is no tombstone for them. I find unmarked graves sad and I wish I could afford to mark them all but, damn, headstones are expensive.

Last year I did a presentation for the Allen County Public Library Genealogy Center about a project of mine related to a family tombstone. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nw53oHpcfgA 

In brief, during the pandemic I planned a project to visit all the gravesites of my direct ancestors back to my 3rd great grandparents. In general that could be a total of 2 parents, 4 grandparents, 8 great grandparents,16 great-great grandparents, and 32 3rd great grandparents; a total of 62 souls in all. For me, though, both my parents are living as well as my nonagenarian grandma so I had the potential need to visit 59 graves. 

As a genealogist though, I have already visited many gravesites. After evaluating the "unvisited," my list was whittled down to 30 graves to visit. There are 9 I am still struggling to locate; most on my French Canadian lines, likely all in Quebec. That means I had to visit 21 unvisited gravesites for this project. I determined where I thought each grave was based on death certificates, obituaries, and/or family members. Fourteen of those 21 graves are in 6 cemeteries within the boundaries of the City of New York. 

Do you sense where this is going? 

Field trip! I visited all 6 of those cemeteries in one crazy day!

During our 4th stop in the 2nd cemetery, my cousin Peter and I saw this site in St. John Cemetery in Middle Village, Queens, New York; Section 16, Row A, Grave 403. Can you pick out the grave for my 3rd great grandpa, Victor Henry (March 1838 - November 9, 1896)?

Yeah that's it. Right there in the middle. Broken. 

Like I said, it is rare my ancestors have a headstone so to find this one broken broke my heart. I immediately began a family campaign to replace the stone which was a process in and of itself (also discussed in the video). 

What I want to highlight here, though, is the hidden cost of replacing a headstone or erecting a marker on an unmarked grave. It is not just a matter of going to a stone carver and picking out something pretty to bear your loved one's name and dates of birth and death. Oh no, it is so much more than that. Depending on the cemetery, there may be many fees; fees to review their records, fees to remove the damaged stone, permit fees to allow the stone carver to place a new stone, and something called perpetual care fees.

Now maybe you'll be lucky to avoid all that but my ancestors were Catholics and in New York City. If yours were too, be prepared to pay up. Well, think about it. Any land in New York City is expensive and maybe the separation of church and state means a cemetery with religious affiliation doesn't have to pay taxes to the state on that land (I don't know) but even so, once a cemetery sells a plot, how do they continue to make any money? Someone has to pay the people who mow the lawn and manage the records, so most cemeteries charge maintenance fees to grave owners for that very reason.

So, perpetual care... According to the New York State Division of Cemeteries, "All cemeteries must cut the grass on all graves and provide some degree of maintenance to other types of final resting places." Cemeteries can sell “endowed” or “perpetual” care services, meaning the individual who buys the plot pays a fee to the cemetery. The cemetery holds or invests that money to earn profits thus being able to continue long term care beyond basic grass cutting, such as beautifying the cemetery with plantings, or cleaning the monument, or fixing pathways, etc. The contract between the cemetery and the buyer will show what care will be provided. 

When a family has bought perpetual care, that does not ensure the cemetery will be cared for in perpetuity. If the cemetery's investment does not generate enough income to cover cost of maintenance, the cemetery could fall into disrepair or the cemetery may ask, but cannot require, the family to increase the amount of money in the account. 

So, when a plot is purchased, the cemetery will ask the plot owner to pay a perpetual care fee. Frequently there was be an option to pay a lesser fee annually rather than a larger perpetual care fee. My family, not being financially well off, typically opt for the lesser annual fee. Then, time goes by and the plot owner stops paying it for whatever reason; maybe they themselves pass away as was the case with Victor Henry's son who bought the plot to bury his father. What this means is that the plot is left in arrears, which means you haven't paid your bill. 

That adds up over time and when the next burial comes around, or in my case, when someone wants to restore a headstone or erect a new one, you have to pay that accrued back care fee. 

My advice, just pay the perpetual care fee from the get go and communicate that to the family. That is why you find headstone that have "perpetual care" engraved on them. Sure, the cemetery may ask for additional funds but they can't demand care fees, not in NY they can't. Spare your descendants the expense and just pay the fee.

By the way, this is Victor Henry's new headstone; financed by many of his descendants and placed just in time for the 125th anniversary of his death. Without the exact dates of birth and death for all those interred, I opted to just put the years although I do much prefer when the whole date is present.

52 Ancestors Challenge Week 45: "Ghost Story" - An Apparition in Freeport

I don't really have family ghost stories, at least not one related to my family history. I mean both my sister and I recall separate instances of a ghostly apparition in the upstairs of our childhood home. The figure of a man dressed as a fly fisherman didn't seem to be a relative but ya never know.

My Uncle Walter, my uncle by marriage, now deceased, spoke of a home in his family located in Brooklyn that was haunted. Uncle Walter passed away in 2014 after a battle with brain cancer. Given that he is no longer with us I could not pin down a story. I clearly recall him referring to the "upstairs" of a brownstone being the residence of the specters and that he had either seen or hear a story of someone watching a toy roll back and forth across an upstairs floor. My sister recalls him speaking of sounds of a baby crying. Again, though, not really a ghost story I recall.

I once came across a story in a newspaper about a ghost in the town of Freeport, Long Island, New York where my Losee family lived. Several of the articles, and yes, there were several, mentioned an encounter between the specter and a John Losee. I am not entirely sure that the John Losee in the article was indeed my relative though. The articles describe him as a young man with the middle initial R. My great-great grandfather, John M. Losee Jr., would have been about 23 at the time and although that sounds young to me now, hmm, the article gave me the sense that this was a teenager interviewed.

The story I first saw appeared in the Brooklyn Daily Eagle on November 19, 1893, page 20. (See below for article, followed by a transcription for those who cannot read the image).

An Apparition in Freeport

It Appears to be a Man Seven Feet High and Waltzes on One Foot

Freeport, L.I., Nov. 18 - Fearful hearts are beating in this village to-night. Fathers have deserted warm firesides and mothers have sent their sons forth to rid Freeport on an apparition. Men are patrolling the streets armed with weapons of war of modern and ancient make, ready to shoot the strange being if it appears in their path.

The apparition made its initial appearance in Freeport's streets a week ago. It has held undisputed away after nightfall ever since. The vicinity of lower Main Street has been the favorite haunt of the mysterious being. That portion of the street is lined on both sides by large trees and is shrouded in deep gloom after nightfall. Aside from the attractions mentioned it is a favorite spot with the youth of the place.

Miss Pauline Klein was being escorted home by Joseph Bennett of Hempstead. When near a place known as the Dell Raynor property a man jumped from behind a tree. He began a high-kicking act on the sidewalk. Miss Klein uttered a piercing shriek and clutched Mr. Bennett's arm.

"Oh! Joe! Joe! what is it!" asked the young woman, in husky tones. Before Mr. Bennett could reply, the strange being made a dash for the couple. Miss Klein and her escort fled down the street. Finally when forced to stop for want of breath, they turned and looked back. There was no one in sight.

The apparition has been seen several times since that night and has frightened a number of persons. Martin Acorn, employed as a hostler in a village hotel, had a lively experience with the apparition last night. A little later John Losee walked down Main Street whistling the "Girl I Left Behind Me," when the apparition jumped from behind a house and began to waltz towards him on one foot.

Those who have seen the "terror" describe him as a man 7 feet in height, with red flowing side whiskers and a face as white as snow. His face looks as if it was painted. His clothing is ragged, and, in running, he has a knee action like a trotting horse.

It makes me laugh what was taken for news, then and now to be honest. The story was also covered in the New York Times, The World, The Buffalo Currier, The Buffalo Weekly Express, and The Sun. Yes, prominent publications. The Sun was the paper in which, just 4 years later on September 21, 1897, Francis Church responded to 8 year-old Virginia O'Hanlon with the now famous line "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus." And as Virginia's papa said, "If you see it in The Sun it's so."

The Buffalo Weekly Express had more lurid details of John's encounter with the apparition running around Freeport in it's November 30th coverage.

John R. Losee got closer than either of the preceding witnesses. The shape appeared to Losee while he was going home about 10 o'clock on Thursday evening (probably November 23, 1893). Losee agrees on the eight feet tall and white hair on the face, and adds that the features looked like a man and wore very ragged clothes. Losee was walking in lower Main Street when the creature attacked him. Losee reached out his hand to catch the monster, but it dissolved as it had done in the presence of Austin Ellison, Losee says you can't hear the ghost's feet strike when it runs.

Now the apparition is 8 feet tall. Grew a foot since the last newspaper. The November 26th edition of The World revealed that the culprit had already been unmasked though; like a scene from Scooby Doo. It was no other than a few high spirited local young men. 

As was stated in The World at the time, the so-called ghost first appeared here [Freeport, Long Island, NY] on Nov. 12 [1893]. From that time until last Thursday [Nov. 28] the entire town has spent more or less time hunting the apparition or fleeing from it. On that night one of the "ghosts" was caught.

The air of this place seems to have been filled with all the ingredients that make what are known as practical jokers. It appears not that this air affected some of our young men. Charles H. Lott, Jr., was the first affected. Dressed in a gunning suit of heavy brown canvas and a "sou'wester" hat he was on his way to the bay late Sunday night, Nov. 12, when he suddenly came across Joseph Bennett and Miss Pauline Kleinert sitting on the front stoop of the young woman's home. Thinking to elude  them Lott was sneaking around the house when Bennett caught sight of him and started towards him. Lott then started  on a run across the lots and soon outdistanced Bennett, who returned to the young woman. They discussed the matter and came to the conclusion that they had seen a ghost. The following Wednesday [November 15] night a "ghost" in the person of Harry Smith, twenty-two years old, appeared on the main road and was chased by quite a crowd. The "ghost" was lost in the woods. Smith had conveniently climbed a tree.

On Sunday [Nov. 26] last, Allison [I think this is really Austin as mentioned in the article above] Ellison who had been Smith's confederate, dressed himself in feminine attire and startled half the town by running like mad through the main streets. Through the efforts of Smith a crowd gave chase and followed "Ghost" Ellison to a pond, where the crowd lost sight of him. He had unhesitatingly plunged into the water and swam away.

The next evening [Monday, Nov. 27] William Bouschier, one of the reputable young men of the town decided to catch the ghost. He did so. Louis Friedman, employed by Henry Mead's bakery, had arrayed himself in all the clothing necessary for a well-equipped ghost and late at night started out. He had not gone far when Bouschier got on his track and caught him in the woods where Friedman, fearful of a beating made known his identity.

So let's see that "ghost" was at least 4 people -  Charles H. Lott, Jr., Harry Smith, Austin Ellison, and Louis Friedman. Not exactly a witch hunt but a little mass hysteria for the village.