Monday, May 9, 2016

Mother's Day: Blah

I am now older than my maternal grandmother was when she passed away. 

Yeah, it's Monday, people. It takes some effort for me to get into a good mood on Mondays. And Mother's Day is rough for me. Anyway...I'm semi-recycling a post that I think demonstrates an abundance of love that existed on my mother's side of the family.

I am 41 years, 10 months, and 19 days, but if you tell anyone this I will adamantly deny it. I AM 28! Grandma Marilyn was just 41 years, 9 months, and 7 days when she passed away leaving her husband of 21 years with six children ranging in age from 20 to 2. My mother is the eldest.

Several years ago, when applying for my membership to the Daughters of the American Revolution (DAR). I needed to track down my maternal grandparents' marriage certificate. No one in the family really knew their anniversary which didn't surprise me. 

A few years earlier though, I received a photocopy of a newspaper clipping from my aunt that announced their engagement. So here grandma is at age 19.  

The DAR genealogist discovered that the clipping came from the January 22, 1951 issue of the Long Island Star. There was also an earlier announcement in the January 5, 1951 issue of the same newspaper. Based on this, I think my grandparents got engaged at Christmas or New Years. However, I still didn't know when they were married. I assumed it had to be in at some church in Queens. For my application to the DAR I need to know this information and so I ordered their marriage record from the Office of the City Clerk.

Well, they were married in Greenwood Lake, NY, a resort community about an hour and a half northwest of Elmhurst, Queens, NY on March 25, 1951.  

The end of March? 
My mother was born in late November.

Some quick math and I realized that my mom was born only 34 weeks after the marriage and to my knowledge she was not pre-mature.

Scandal, scandal. 

Grandma would have been 6 weeks pregnant when they married. She probably knew she was pregnant; although, maybe not. Have you ever seen these stories where the woman goes into labor and she didn't even know she was pregnant?? 

I mean, it's not scandalous now. In fact, it is very common but I can imagine that back in 1951 it would have horrified grandma's good Catholic family. It doesn't matter to me though. There is no doubt in my mind that they were very, very much in love then and until the end. So what does it matter?? It doesn't.

My maternal grandfather was widowed at 46 and he never remarried. I am not sure if that is a testament to his undying love for my grandmother or evidence that not many women are open to the opportunity to acquire a ready-made family of six children. 

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